


I'm in love with the sun

by otaku1295707



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Or Is It?, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28416390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/otaku1295707/pseuds/otaku1295707
Summary: If Hinata was the sun then Kenma was Icarus, a foolish boy who fell in love with the sun. A lovesick boy who burned his wings if it meant he could get a glimpse of the sun.(Hanahaki Disease AU)
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	I'm in love with the sun

It was just one stupid kiss, a kiss that didn't mean anything but then it became two, three, and before he knew it became multiple stupid kisses that had no meaning. It meant nothing until it did.

Every kiss he received would burn his skin like how the sunburned Icarus’s. It felt as if his flesh would melt away every time he was touched by him, it was a beautiful and painful experience to touch the sun. To be in love with the sun. 

If Hinata was the sun then Kenma was Icarus who flew too close to the sun. He knew the tragedy of Icarus who fell in love with the sun. He flew higher and higher trying to catch a glimpse of the sun. Kenma felt pity for him because Icarus never met the sun as his wings burned in flames. 

Many people consider Icarus a foolish boy for giving up his wings for the sun, everyone told him not to fly too close to the sun as it would melt the waxwings but the moment his eyes caught the blessing sun, nothing else mattered. Even as he heard his father scream out to him, Icarus kept flapping his wings until he fell. 

The thing was that Kenma understood, he knew exactly why Icarus was willing to give up everything despite his life just beginning because once he saw the sun Icarus knew that his life would never be the same. How could he after all, how could he go back to living a life from the ground when he's already experienced what it's like being in the sky basking in the warmth under the beautiful sun. Icarus could have but instead, he chose to keep flying, burning in agony. 

Kenma is certain that Icarus laughed, smiling at the sun as he fell to the sea because that’s exactly what he would do. Because he loved it, he did it for the sun. He loved the beautiful sun when others feared the sun. He laughed not understanding how others avoid the sun instead of embracing it. 

Every action someone commits causes a bit of it pain, loving someone was always going to cause a bit of pain. It just so happens that he and Icarus fell in love with the burning sun, they loved it unconditionally. 

Even as he lays in bed unable to feel anything but the flowers growing inside, he finds himself staring at the sun from the hospital window. Kuroo and the others would never understand him and pity him for falling in love with the sun or call him crazy for choosing not to get rid of his feelings, they did everything they could to make him reconsider, that he’ll die if he kept going

Kenma knew that the flowers that kept growing inside of him would kill him. He knew the first time he was covered in petals stained with blood that he was going to die. He knew from the moment the sun-kissed his nap burning his skin with his seductive kisses as he laughed, unable to stop the flames in his heart. 

Kenma didn't mind when the flowers started blooming in his lungs and he found himself having trouble breathing. Nobody knew about the disease until he was caught coughing flowers one-day after he was done streaming, Kuroo had begged him to get it surgically removed but it was no use Kenma had already made up his mind. Just like Icarus, he was willing to die if it meant he could catch a glimpse of the sun for one last time.

As he looked out the window, Kenma thought back to when he was brought to the hospital after witnessing the sun smile at someone else so brightly that it was blinding. When he woke up his whole body burned, he turned to the doctor with the white overcoat who asked him if it was worth it. Kenma stopped thinking about the boy with orange hair who he fell in love with calling out his name and with all the strength in his body he smiled and answered “Yes, it is”

Everyone knew that their story would end in a tragic ending, everyone pitted the boy who fell in love with the sun but in Kenma’s opinion it should be the sun they feel sorry for because while everyone loved the sun no one dared to get too close to the sun fearing that they'd get burned. People never considered how lonely the sun must feel to be admired and envied by others surrounded by nothing but space. Even the moon was surrounded by the stars while the sun was by its lonesome.

Kenma understood why Icarus smiled as he fell from the sky because he caught a glimpse of the sun smiling at him. It was worth it if it meant that the sun understood that he was wanted, that there was someone who wanted him. 

Loving the sun was so easy and addictive that it baffled him how he loved the sun more and more than each passing day. Kenma never understood what it meant to love someone until the sun found him all alone. There were no words to describe his love for Hinata Shoyo because there were too many.

“Kenma, you can’t keep going on any longer you'll die,” Kuroo said, taking a seat next to him. It was obvious to him that he was holding back his tears. 

Kenma hated watching his best friend hurt but as selfish it is he didn't want to forget “Kuroo, I don't want to forget the love I have for him” Kenma responded, unable to make eye contact. “I’ll rather die then forget about him” 

“Kenma…”

Shoyo shines bright just like the sun, he was warm just like the sun but he wasn't the sun because the sun’s flames don't go out but Shoyo’s did. He died, and the only thing he had to remember about him was this feeling that grew that he never got to confess. Kenma never wished to get rid of his feelings because he loved them but the day before he was going to confess there was a car accident, Shoyo died saving a young girl from a car leaving him with only memories of unrequited love. 

Kenma never cried for having the Hanahaki disease. It wasn't even that came as a surprise but that day at Shoyo's funeral he sobbed for hours coughing up flowers ending up being hospitalized permanently. That was when his condition worsened but Kenma hadn’t cared about that. All that he could think about was that he never got to admit his feelings for the sun or even say goodbye. 

  
  
  


Kuroo watched as Kenma’s coffin was being dropped across the room he could see his parents crying being comforted by the other adults and from the other side, there was the old team whipping at the death of their setter. 

His eyes had cried so much that there weren't any left for the funeral instead he just sat down thinking about the last conversation he had with his best friend. That day he left the hospital was only hours away from Kenma taking his last breath, he thought he would have more time to convince his friend he should have known that there would be no way Kenma would have chosen to get rid of it. 

Back in his third year he remembers comparing him to Icarus as a joke when he first developed a crush on Hinata not realizing what would come years later, now he can only pray that somewhere in the after life Kenma is reunited with the one he loves and finally confesses his feelings. 

  
  
  



End file.
